Chris Wiegman Chris Wiegman

Time is Weird

I’ve always had a strange relationship with time. At various points it has lead to people suggesting I get tested for ADHD and other things and, maybe they’re right.

I see the issue a lot these past few weeks since our move. It’s not that I can’t focus on anything, it’s that I’m almost scared to devote the time to anything. When a project comes up such as a blog post or something else I feel like I just can’t devote the time to it. What if someone else needs me? What if something else comes up? The list of worries is long.

I don’t think this shows up anywhere as thoroughly as it does on this site. I have quite a few more in-depth blog posts started but I rarely finish them anymore. Instead nearly everything I push out, such as this post, is what is in my head when I write it and rarely can I bring myself to want to spend more than 15 minutes on a post. For everything else I literally start to panic when thinking “that might take me an hour, I can’t do it.”

I don’t know what the answer is to this. While it’s gotten far worse the last few years, I’ve been this way pretty much my whole life. It’s just one more thing to seek professional help on, I guess.